How fear lost its grip!
I have several fears: tight spaces, four-legged creatures, and mermaids, to name a few! Admittedly, I have never seen or interacted with a mermaid and cannot prove they exist. Many consider this fear grossly irrational. But to me, it is not! Herein lies the mystery of fears: Fears are unquestionably realistic to the one who has them, even if they appear imaginary to others.
Let us consider some common fears: Going to the dentist, death, and public speaking, which about 77% of humans fear, as reported by the National Library of Medicine. I do not fear these. I also view them as unavoidable or inevitable. – Oral care is necessary. I speak in public to meet a need, not because I love hearing the echoes of my voice. As for death, it is the poster child of inevitability – a door we must all cross. It is not a choice. However, in many instances, overcoming fear requires making a choice. Recently, I experienced this!
The critical choice
For some time, I experienced intense back pain. Convinced it was a fluke byproduct of a neurological condition, I resolved to stomach it silently: no painkillers and no complaints. It was tough! Surprisingly, during a discussion with a stranger, I learned they experienced the same and found relief. Also, I learned of a notable pain management specialist. As quickly as I could, I made plans to see him.
At the medical visit, he lived up to his reputation. He conducted several tests. But towards the end of our appointment, he dropped the dreaded news! He said I can’t exactly tell what is causing the pain. It’s probably nothing serious, but I need more information. We’ll need you to do a lumbar spine MRI. As soon as he said MRI, I thought, No! I detest those machines! They are tight, dark, and creepy. And the immobilization mask they put over your face reminds me of the horror movie The Silence of the Lambs. Now might be a good time to flee!
Do not flee!
Fortunately, I did not run! I knew resisting this opportunity would be rejecting a good thing solely because of fear. Twenty seconds later, I lifted my head, looked at the doctor, and muttered a faint ok. Three days later, I had to show up for the MRI appointment. The night before the appointment, I barely got any sleep. I lay wide awake, tossing and turning, imagining how dreadful the experience would be. Ironically, I have had so many MRIs I lost count. But before every one of them, fear grips me like it’s the first. In one instance, I pressed the panic button twice and asked to see my sister. Thereby prolonging the nightmare by an hour! But this time, I was determined things would be different and began strategizing.
A way to face fear
In the morning, I arrived at the imaging center. As the hospital staff checked me in, I recalled my strategy: never look at the machine, lay down, shut your eyes, and envisage the desired future. And I stuck to the script! From when I walked into the scan room to when I left, I did not look into the machine. I lay on the scanning bed, closed my eyes, put in my earplugs, and imagined how joyful I would be when the pain was gone, and I realized specific dreams for 2025. In short order, I was so relaxed I fell asleep. Seemingly seconds later, the scan was complete, the MRI tech helped me out of the machine, and I went on my merry way.
Driving home, I marveled at how different this experience was from past ones. It was uneventful! The strategy for dealing with a gripping fear worked: Focus on the dream, not the problem.
That evening, when I shared the experience with my sister, she was jubilant! Over the years, she coached and encouraged me through several MRI debacles. I could not have conquered the fear without her. Indeed, as an exceptional human has said, success is a team sport.
Until next time!
For you and to you,
Aké
Image credit: Pexels | Nilina